I seriously never thought I will blog about my intership so soon! Today is like DAY ONE, yet I seriously hope that it is the LAST DAY! T.T Everything, and I really mean EVERY SINGLE THING, that happened today really made me regret accepting this internship.

To start things of, I guess I really hate being in a totally new environment. This is inevitable, be it for school or for work, thus I accepted it and tried to be optimistic about the new department to which I am interning in. OKAY! AND I HAVE TO SAY THAT THIS ENVIRONMENT TOTALLY DOESN'T SUIT ME AT ALL!! =X It is SOOOOOOOOOOO quiet that I can literally hear people breathing! And during the 8h on my first day, less than 10 sentences were exchanged between the people in the department! 0.o They seem like nice people, but then, I think I really need to be in a happier/cheerful environment.

Did I mention that I feel SO OPPRESSED in the office? =X At KPMG, I always relied on 'THE WINDOW' to bring myself moments of solace. Now, with my table RIGHT SMACK in the middle of the office, I feel myself suffocating. True enough that the view from the 44th Storey is really awesome, so awesome that I can even see Sentosa from the window, but it is TOO FAR AWAY from me to serve its therapeutic functions. T.T I seriously think I'm weird and I'm totally not cut out for an office job. Shall attempt to venture into events management/planning instead! ^^

Anyway, for people who know me, I'm someone who totally CANNOT eat alone! If that ever happens, it's either I'm on the phone when I'm eating or I've bought finger food that I can just walk and eat. During lunch today, I've heard the most shocking thing ever! 0.o "Today is your first day, so we will eat with you. But from tomorrow onwards, you will have to eat yourself because it's the peak period now." I seriously wonder how I will survive the NEXT THREE MONTHS. T.T They even mentioned that they never ate with Jin-E when he was there for 3.5 months and I was lucky that they took the time off. =/ I really don't know if I should be HAPPY or SAD! =X

And the BEST THING is the fact that I cannot reply SMS or pick up calls at all during office hours? Apparently according to the company's rules, it will affect productivity and so on. I do agree that excessive phone calls and SMS will affect, but a few won't hurt, right? =X In addition, there is NO internet connection to my working computer at all, so when I need the internet to google definitions, they will help me login for that 5-10mins? (cause after that time frame, it will prompt for the password again? -.-") And all the car terminologies are seriously killing me. DD= All the what gear what back-emf cell what safety-control circuits? OMG! I'm not even learning how to drive nor learning to be a mechanic, why do I need to know all these terminologies?? T.T

I think at the rate my eyes are glued to the computer, my degree will shoot up to 1000 by this month! =/ If you think cross-checking surveys are easy, you are so freaking WRONG. Just imagine cross-checking surveys that are in HINDI? MALAY? For one, I do not even know how to write Hindi, much lest even recognize them? How to even notice when there is a mistake?DD= What's worse is going through the at least 50-page survey filled with foreign words! Cross-checking seriously takes up A lOT OF TIME! =/ I was so delusionised that I keep telling myself that those Hindi words are Korean to make my life a little better! LMAO! *pearlx, don't take me to shutter island T.T*

And did I mention that there was a BLACKOUT in office today? Totally win right? To think that this is my first day at work and WOAH! DD= For one, my pay is charged according to the things I do, thus during a blackout, despite me being stuck in office, time is not charged at all and I practically wasted my afternoon? -.-"" I seriously abhor this system whereby it's a daily affair for me to record the stuff I do everyday! =/

There are actually many more (unhappy?) things that happened today at office, but I guess I shall take it with a pinch of salt! WELCOME TO REALITY GERMAINE! IT'S TIME TO STEP OUT OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE AND GROW STRONGER + INDEPENDENT! =D

I guess one of the few happy things that kept me going was Jinki's picture on my desk! ^^ One guy in office said "Is that your boyfriend?" HAHAHAHA!! "YESYESYES!!!" He is totally my motivation now!! ^^ And on a random side note, the manager told me that when she asked Jin-E whether I am his girlfriend, he actually said YES, which I totally won't believe at all please! I know Jin-E for 8 years already to know him well enough that this is something he WON'T say! -.-"

"LAST BUT NOT LEAST, I WANT TO TELL YOU THAT NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER!! ^^"

OMG! I SERIOUSLY THINK I'M A LITTLE CRAZY THAT I'M BECOMING DELUSIONAL. I THINK IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE I GET TOO ABSORBED INTO MY OWN FICTIONALIZED WORLD. IF THAT DAY EVER COMES, PLEASE PULL ME BACK TO REALITY! =DD I DON'T WANT TO END UP IN SHUTTER ISLAND! T.T

And I'm seriously randomly missing XiaoLongBao! I'm just waiting for him to end his exams so that I can rant+rave all I want!! ^^ KOR!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN I NEEDED YOU THE MOST? T.T And please bring your death note book along!! I want to commit suicide first!! =X But that will be after I get my birthday buffet treat from you!! =DD And YES! I'm a super spoilt sister! So just admit with that fact and move on in life! HAHAHAHA!! ^^

_germx
You have to take responsibility for this fool that's fallen for you~
2o1oo5o3.2333h

Labels: internship, Lee Jinki 이진기, Onew 온유, self-reflection, SHINee 샤이니